


Perfect is for the Urgent (Baby I Want Forever)

by bagwet



Category: GOT7
Genre: Childhood Friends, Confessions, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, M/M, i might add a second part to this who knows UUHH, like it is literally 5k of fluff idk what the fuck happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-08
Updated: 2018-01-08
Packaged: 2019-03-02 07:18:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13313157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bagwet/pseuds/bagwet
Summary: Jackson's realization of how first impressions aren't always true.But it's okay because he doesn't love Jinyoung any less.





	Perfect is for the Urgent (Baby I Want Forever)

**Author's Note:**

> WOW it's been a God awful time since I last posted something!! Here's 5k worth of word vomit of nothing but pure fluff.
> 
> As usual I like skimmed through this so if there are any typos my apologies!!
> 
> ++also, while pasting this from word some weird symbols and things appeared?? I tried my best to get rid of them, but if I left some out I am so sorry!! please let me know things out of place/weird and ill fix them! it rly fucked up my format aaaaa

Jackson, at first, had thought that Park Jinyoung was perfect in every aspect of the word.

Which perhaps to the outside eye he was.

He had not only excelled in his academics -making high honour roll every year of school-, but also participated in various amounts of extra-curricular activities, from things like poetry club all the way to the environmental action committee to even French club. He had even tutored in the free time he somehow managed to scrounge up. And that's how he'd come to meet Jackson.

-

Jinyoung looked near to tears as he repeated the conjugation for what seemed like the hundredth time to the new foreigner in his school, and new neighbour. He underlined the word with a bit more force than necessary as he ~~failed~~ tried to re-explain the honorifics system of the Korean language with a tight smile on his lips.

They were sat on Jinyoung's bed, Jackson noted how neat his room was and the distant look of despair on Jinyoung's face as the latter eyed another pile of papers on the desk in the corner of his room, presumably his own homework that's probably due tomorrow.

"Can you help me say something?" Jinyoung perked up, pulling his eyes away from the heap of papers mocking him and nodded over-enthusiastically, a tight smile stretched his lips.

"How do you tell someone you think they're cute in formal Korean?" Jackson smiles wide, pleased with the reddening of Jinyoung's ears and the growing flush on his cheeks as he struggled to formulate an answer, a phrase, _anything_. Jackson saved him the trouble, "Just kidding, I already know." He really didn't, but he just wanted to see the ultimate boy next door flustered. He pinches his cheeks and moves to finishing the practice work for basic conjugation. Completely unaware of the tingling on the Korean boy's cheek from where Jackson had touched him.

-

However, his grades and school participation weren't the only things that made him catch people's attention. From his always perfectly tousled dark hair, to his seemingly flawlessly smooth skin, his cute button nose, his pink, plump and soft lips, to his perfectly aligned pearly whites and to those agonizingly cute ears, and Jackson never knew ears could even _be_ cute.

-

Jackson rolled around in bed, before deciding to face a sleeping Jinyoung. This was their third sleepover of the week, and the week wasn’t even halfway through. Summer finally came after a long and grueling school year, one that they survived with the help of each other. They concluded that they would make the most of this summer before school came back around and they had to somehow push through another whole year of sleepless nights and endless stress. But that really just meant one of the two would go the other’s house, everyday, stay until late playing Mario Cart if they weren’t already sleeping over.

Jackson was sixteen, and Jinyoung fifteen as his birthday was later into the year, and they were glued at the hip since they were both ten and Jackson had moved in next door.

Jackson analyzed the sleeping figure’s face; studied the gentle slope of his soft, round nose, the way his long and sharp eyelashes delicately dusted over his cheekbones. Eyes trailed down to the pudginess of his round cheeks, trekking back up to the way his big ears framed his entire face. He refocused to his entire face, admired the look of serenity which had been long-missed because Jinyoung hadn’t done anything but study and stress over finals, Jackson at his side through it all. A sudden urge to caress his cheek, trace his lips, just touch the other in the most innocently intimate ways, washed over Jackson, catching him off guard.

He quickly teared his focus away from sleeping prince beside him, flopping suddenly on his back, eyes glued to the ceiling.

Rustled from the sudden movement, Jinyoung groaned and stretched, smacking Jackson in the face, _hey_! Jackson exclaimed in a loud whisper, before facing his childhood best friend. His eyes heavy with sleep, pout prominent, “Why are you up and moving so much, it’s like” he paused to turn around and check the time on his side table, Jackson eyed the expanse of his neck, “God, it’s two-oh-six in the morning, Jackson.” Sensing the tenseness of his best friend from his uncharacteristic silence, worried, he snuggled closer.

“Bad dream?” Jinyoung questioned. Jackson took a second to think, and hummed.

“Something like that.” He said. He didn’t know what else to say.

Because starting to feel something for your best friend really _did_ seem like a horrible nightmare.

Then, and even now, Jackson could really go on and on about his first expressions were of Jinyoung. He seemed untouchable, so _perfect_ ; unreal.

Jackson’s come to learn, though, from dating him for years now, and being friends for longer, that Jinyoung wasn’t perfect. Like, at all. But to him, he guesses that he’s close enough.

Jackson learned that Jinyoung is impatient. Incredibly so.

-

“Oh my God, would it kill you to hurry it up?” Jinyoung did nothing, but yell in a shrill voice.

Jackson huffed, flinging through his clothes for his graduation cap. They were already late to the practice graduation ceremony, very late at that, and Jinyoung really didn’t want to be late for his very real, and very soon graduation. Jackson’s eyes flickered to his bedside table, forty minutes “til to, and it’s only a short drive to school. He rolled his eyes.

“Give me a sec, you think I want to be late either?” _Not that we will be anyways_ , Jackson finished in his head. He said nothing aloud though. Growing up, he’s learned when to and not to hold his tongue around Jinyoung.

A quick exclamation of “a-ha!” as he raised his cap in victory, but Jackson’s celebration was cut short when a pair of hands grabbed him by the back of his robe and dragged him to out his room and down the stairs. It’s a surprise that Jackson hadn’t fallen down the stairs in the flurry of footsteps.

However, he did stumble when Jinyoung roughly pulled him in for a kiss after they threw their caps.

-

To add to the ever-growing list of _Reasons Why Park Jinyoung Isn’t_ Actually _Perfect_ : he’s learned that, contrary to what most people would think, Jinyoung wasn’t the most neat and tidy.

-

Jackson opened the door to a familiar scene of one Park Jinyoung passed out on the couch, laptop forgotten on the centre table, the mug that Jackson had gotten him as a souvenir gift from China had rings of stained coffee in it teetering precariously at the edge, and papers amuck all around him. Jackson’s always wondered how he somehow knew where everything was, even with the colour-coded sticky notes, it all was a bit chaotic to say the least.

He lets out an ugly noise when trips over one of Jinyoung’s shoes in the middle of the short hallway leading to the living room. He lets a disgruntled noise at the back of his throat before kicking the shoe to the rest of the pile of shoes at the entrance.

Tired, he still cleans up Jinyoung’s mess; collecting all the skewed papers in one large pile””Jinyoung can properly organize it himself, saves his work before closing the laptop, places the mug into the sink and fills it with water to ease the grip of the coffee stains of the mug to wash better later. He also throws in a dish left out with bits of takeout food before he heads back to his sleeping beauty snoring on their couch.

When he walks back into the living room, he sees that he’s woken from all the ruckus in the kitchen, tiredly rubbing at his eyes, a pout set on his full lips and hair mussed from sleep.

Jinyoung looks up, his face melting into an easy, relaxed smile when he sees his boyfriend is back from the gym. He opens his arms expectantly and Jackson practically dives in, tackling him back down on the couch with a grunt and letting himself melt into the latter’s arms. Fingers running through his slightly sweaty hair, petting him and arms tightening around his waist.

For someone who sure causes a lot of chaos in his life, he can’t help but feel at absolute peace in his presence, in his arms.

-

And _God_ was he ever petty.

-

Mark huffed at the sight of Jackson, distressed and frown set, when he opened the door to his shared apartment with Jaebum. He sighed and let his same-heighted (he’s actually shorter, it’s the insoles) friend in without a second thought before slamming the door, letting it be known that they had yet another unwelcomed friend.

Unwelcomed only as they were both sort of having _another_ little spat.

The four had met each other through Jackson. One day, Jackson had to run errands, one of them being grocery shopping and the fencer halted to a stop, the groceries in the (full) cart nearly toppling over as his mind processed and remembered the face of Mark from his past martial arts tricking classes, quickly making his way over to him.

Mark flustered by the sudden rush of questions from the overly excited person of his past, ambushed by him out of nowhere. He still got to answer the barrage of questions though, somehow, for the most part. Barely getting to confirm that he was indeed seeing someone before Jackson happily suggested they should go out on a double date.

He couldn’t even say no before Jackson’s rambling about _how him and Jaebum should totally come over for dinner sometime soon_ , because it was interrupted by a ringing in his back pocket, the Hong Kong man’s excitement and bright eyes dimmed into a soft, fond glow before he excused himself.

Mark stood awkwardly, shifting from feet to feet as he watched the man before him listened intently to the person in the phone and scribble more things onto his list, nodding his head and said goodbye, lips twitching up into a smile when he said, “ _I love you too_ “. Hearing those words from Jinyoung always felt like their first time.

Now, Mark shifted uncomfortable on his feet, watching the tense back of one of his best friends as he knocked on his shared bedroom, currently preoccupied with his boyfriend and his best friend’s boyfriend. There was a mumbling and defeated sigh before the door swung open, revealing an irritated Jaebum, whether the irritation was towards Jackson or Jinyoung himself was not known.

He sighed exasperatedly before walking past Jackson without a word.

And shoving him inside.

Quickly closing the door and holding it shut while he motioned for Mark to hand him a chair to put underneath the door knob, the sounds of banging on the door resonated through the quiet abode, accompanied with shouts of aggravation. The actual owners of the apartment could only sigh and walk away, turning up the volume all the way to block out the yelling that would ensue.

It all was quickly halted when Jinyoung pulled Jackson away from the door, still refusing to look at him and his arms crossed.

“I can’t believe you’re actually mad at me for taking Bam out for meat!” Jackson threw his arms up in exasperation. Remembering the way Jinyoung hadn’t even let him in, leaving and walking past Jackson, but not before locking the door before the latter could even say hello.

“For the third time this week!”

“We eat together everyday!”

“You took him out!”

“It’s really not that big of a deal” Jackson said dejectedly. “I don’t get why you’re being so petty. Arguing over this, it’s so tiring.” Jackson plunked down on the bed, still distant from Jinyoung.

“If I’m so petty, if this is so tiring, why don’t you just go back to Bambam.” Jinyoung deadpanned. Unwilling to show any other emotions, certainly not insecurity or sadness. He stood up abruptly to head towards the door, but a hand on the wrist stopped him.

Jinyoung didn’t turn around when he heard a sigh. Didn’t stop him from being pulled onto the bed, this time right beside him, thighs brushing, an arm snaking around his waist and hand resting on his thigh. Dark brown hair tickled his pudgy cheek, he inhaled deeply before resting his head on the black roots that started to come in on Jackson’s head.

“Idiot.” Jackson huffed in the crevice of his neck. Jinyoung let out an airy laugh, devoid of any mirth. “I love you.” Jackson said as he rubbed a soothing hand up and down his arm comfortingly. “Why would I leave you for _that_ annoying brat?” Jinyoung pulled away, only to come closer to him, head buried into his shoulder, soft hands clutching Jackson’s own calloused ones.

If Jackson felt the wetness dotting his shirt, he didn’t say anything.

-

Jinyoung was a smart kid in high school (and even after that, continuing in his secondary studies), top of his class and all, but _jeez_ was he ever dumb.

-

Jinyoung had been getting up in Jackson’s case, bothering him incessantly about how often he’s been having practice and how annoyingly diligent he’s being to fencing; asking for extra practice hours, heading to the gym early before school and straight away after school “til late, and mumbling excuses about how _no Jinyoungie, can’t come over, I have to watch these fencing videos, coaches’ orders_.

It’s been forever (a week and three days since Jinyoung’s seen him, but who’s counting?) since they had time to have a sit down and just hang out. The last time they did, they had been just sitting in Jinyoung’s room, Jackson’s head in Jinyoung’s lap as the latter was reading. Both basking in the comfortable silence.

Fingers absentmindedly combing through the light, soft strands of Jackson’s hair as Jinyoung reads page after page, only pausing his petting to flip the page before returning to continue his ministrations. Jackson sighed in bliss, delighted to be relaxing after a particularly hard-driven fencing practice, conditioning painfully dragging on and leaving him lugging his pained limbs in all the way to Jinyoung’s house.

”God, I love coming over here.” Jackson lulls, humming and pleased when Jinyoung starts to stroke his hair. Ready to flop over on his back and kick his legs like a dog.

Jinyoung pauses from reading, looking away from the book and at the giant puppy in his lap and, he absolutely smiles, downright beams, down at him before turning his attention back to the pages. A smile still dancing on his lips.

And Jackson stares. Eyes zoning in on the delicate up-turn of his plump and pink lips, a shadow of a smile as if he’s trying to hide it, and the way his eyes are smiling. The crinkles by his eyes doing something to Jackson, feeling his heart flutter, feeling him swoon with pride knowing he’s the reason for their appearance.

It’s at seventeen years old that Jackson realizes just how deeply, just how in love he is with his best friend.

Sure, there was that one incident in that one sleepover, and countless other fleeting moments like it, but he had pushed those feelings away. Wrestled them down, pushing them in the very back of his mind, slamming the door and putting a deadbolt on those feelings.

But those were nothing compared to the complete and utter love, tenderness, affection, every synonym and everything in between, that he felt for him in this very moment. So pure, so full of complete and absolute love for the man with the eye crinkles and big ears before him. No amount of denial, no matter how strong and vehemently he tried to ignore these feelings, they’ll never go away. He realizes this now.

He could feel something in his chest start to bloom in record-breaking speed, propagating it’s way up his throat and strangling him with it’s vines and leaves and petals. Flowers of all sorts, different kinds, different colours, but all meaning the same to him now: love.

There weren’t thorns, not now, not at all, all he could feel was the softness of the petals encompassing his heart. He felt warm, his blood felt viscous, felt as thick as honey coursing through him with a sweetness and a slow syrupiness that let him bask in the pleasantness of this love. Leaving him to bathe, to soak in, slowly sink deeper and deeper into it. Warmth seeping into his skin, leaving him wide-eyed with fondness and realization of, _oh, this is love_. He let his eyes drift shut for a few more seconds of serenity before he let the snake of anxiety inside him crawl through the garden flowers, of love, letting him be thrown into the frightening reality.

Such an amount of love would scare anyone, and boy did it scare Jackson away. He lunged up, sitting up straight so quickly and so suddenly, knocking out the book from Jinyoung’s hands. Scrambling to stand up, trying to piece together a reason why he had to leave, like, right now.

Confused, Jinyoung sits up slowly. Before he could say anything, Jackson laughed. Loud, forced and uncharacteristically mirthless. Even more thrown off by the sudden change in atmosphere, Jinyoung’s thick brows furrow in confusion towards the older.

The oblivious loved one, tries to reach out to his (unbeknownst to him) lover, but Jackson quickly pulls away and claps his hands together.

“Just remembered, I have to go in early tomorrow to squeeze in some extra practice time!” The now blond haired boy makes quick work of shoving his belongings in his school bag. Trying to drag some time to stay in the oasis of serenity and calmness of Jinyoung’s presence by patting his back pockets for keys he knew were in his bag’s front pocket, while, conflictingly trying to get out of there and away from him as fast as he can.

“But you just had—“ Jinyoung knew his schedule just as well as he knew his own, knew Jackson didn’t have practice back to back-the day after the other-but he didn’t have any time to call him out for his lie because-

“Bye Jinyoungie! See you around!” He slammed the door, and he was gone.

He heard hurried footsteps, a suspicious tumble, as he (dangerously) sprinted down the stairs and the loud, but muffled, sound of his front of the door reverberated through his room. Leaving him lonely, the loud somberness Jackson carried with him gone. The silence constricting and uncomfortable.

His eyes stayed glued to his door, as if the fencer would suddenly burst through the door again, and they’d resume their amiable silence.

It wasn’t until a good two weeks had passed when he got to corner his best friend again. He knew he should be home, though he knew that he should’ve been at _his_ house, he even double checked with his coach. So, here he was, in front of Jackson’s house, his best friend’s house and for some reason, he felt nervous. He felt un-belonging, out of place, in the house he’s been to countless times. Nevertheless, he brushes off the uncertainty inkling in the back of his mind and knocks on the door, knowing Jackson’s mom would be the one to open the door. Jackson never opened the door unless he knew it was for him.

He bows politely at the sight of her. She greets him warmly, scolds him for not coming over enough recently and proceeds to tell him that Jackson’s upstairs. Probably sleeping from the nonstop practices he’s been having, drained. He nods well-manneredly and excuses himself, quietly making his way upstairs. Second door on the left.

There’s a soft orange glow of light escaping through the sliver of opening at the bottom of the door. Slowly turning the knob, he pushes the door gently and tiptoes in, the door softly clicks shut behind him. He’s greeted with the soft snores of his best friend. Head resting on his bent arm, the other laying on his chest to the slow rise and fall of his breathing. His morning clothes were strewn carelessly at his bedside, baggy grey sweat-shorts and plain loose white tee dressing his upper body. He notes the package of heat/cold pads lain haphazardly at the foot of his bed, containers of Tylenol conveniently at his bedside table and the white towel covering his forehead and curses his best friend for not taking better care of himself.

He turns the fan on and points it to him, tucks him in some thinner blankets, replacing his towel with a new and colder one, leaving and coming back to leave a tall glass of water beside the pill container, and folds the clothes all over his room, placing them on his desk.

Once done, he changes in comfy Jackson clothes and slides quietly, inconspicuously beside the unconscious athlete. He feels a tug in his heart when Jackson shifts in his sleep, grabbing at Jinyoung and snuggling closer to him instinctively. He smiles in relief as he finally cards his fingers through Jackson’s hair, turns off the lamp and gets comfortable under him, before he drifts off too.

When he wakes up, it’s before Jackson does, probably due to his exhaustion and overworking himself. He busies himself by grabbing his phone off the sidetable, scrolling through Twitter, liking a few posts here and there from Instagram, replying to messages and so on.

The soft glow of his phone pulls Jackson out from his slumber, squinting through the darkness, his fuzzy vision focuses and the first thing he sees is Jinyoung, who, is oblivious to his awakening. His heart rate picks up at the sight of his angelic face, the blue glow of the screen making him look ethereal, like a dream. _So, that’s still the same_. Jackson sighs.

For a moment, he lays there, unmoving and staring. He thinks about his best friend, his Jinyoung and how he makes him feel, how even while he was avoiding him physically, he couldn’t drift away from thoughts of him. Thinks about what those thoughts make him feel. How it makes him feel warm, as if there’s a sun in him, along with the garden of flowers in his chest. How the warmth Jinyoung never fails to give him, the light, the sun, does nothing but fuel the photosynthesis of the flowers blooming and growing. Leaving him with Spring in his body; flowers flourishing in his rib cage, butterflies in the space where his stomach should be, the sense of clarity and cleansing that washes over him like spring showers when he’s with him.

Dread tides over the serenity. His mind wanders to the very plausible _what if_ of how _these_ feelings could not be reciprocated. He pictures a crumbling friendship. One that he treasures. It’s one that he doesn’t know what he would do without. He imagines losing Jinyoung, simply for wanting him too much, wanting him in a way that’s prohibited.

Then he pauses.

Maybe he’s not giving Jinyoung enough credit.

Jackson continues to stare at him, getting one last good look at him before he makes up his mind.

He sits up, surprising Jinyoung, making him drop his phone. Leaving them in darkness. When he hears Jinyoung shuffling to search for his phone, Jackson blindly grabs his hand and stops him. The dark helps.

“Jinyoung,” He says gravely, finality in his voice.

Jackson swallows. Has to keep going before Jinyoung says something, has to tell him.

“I love you.”

“I’m sorry, but I love you.” He keeps pausing, but bless Jinyoung’s heart, he doesn’t stop him and lets him take his time. Tries to gather the mismatched thoughts, everything he wants to say. “I know you love me, but I- I _love_ you. And I’m sorry for ignoring you lately, had to”¦ to”¦ gather myself?” Prepare himself for rejection? Prepare himself to lose his closest friend? Another pause.

“I can’t word it, can’t even wrap my head around it. I just love you so, _so_ much. You make me feel so many complex things, but I can’t describe eloquently enough, can’t say anything but just _. I love you_.” He breathes. He can’t see Jinyoung’s face, but can feel the rise in his pulse from his wrist. “And it sounds so simple, to just say that it’s not simple, there’s no- no specificity, but what I feel for you, it, it isn’t simple and saying it isn’t simple is such an undermining of how I feel for you.”

“I know you hate cheesy, clichÃ© things and everything in my head is exactly just that, so, you’ll have to forgive me.” For the cheesiness and the fact that he’s ruining a nearly decade long friendship.

“I love you, in every sense of the word.” He clutches at Jinyoung’s hand to ground himself. “I love knowing that I have you in my life, I love knowing that you know me best, so well. And, to some people that may be terrifying, to be at the mercy of someone, be so vulnerable to someone, but I don’t. I _don’t_. You make me feel safe.” Jackson decides to stop making it about himself.

“I love how you get flustered when being genuine, so you hide your love behind quick wit and smartass comments. Like when you bitch at me for procrastinating on another project, you say the only way I’ll even slightly pass is if you help me out, but I know you just don’t want me to stay up late.” The fact that Jinyoung’s face is hidden is simultaneously comforting and terrifying, but he continues anyways. “I love when you ramble about your latest book, I love the way you immerse yourself in these characters’ lives. You’re just so caring, just _such_ a caring person, even to people who don’t even exist. You talk so bright-eyed about your favourite characters, or with a discontented glint in your eyes when talking about one you hate.” A pause. “Your eyes are so expressive,” His voice is soft. “and that’s how I know you love me back.”

“I love loving you.” He smiles sadly. “I love knowing you love me back, at least in a way.” Even if only as a friend, he’ll take any form of love he’ll get because it’s _Jinyoung’s_ love. It’s love, love is love. He loves Jinyoung, he loves his best friend and _fuck,_ does he know without a doubt that he’s loved back. It doesn’t matter in what way because he’s loved and he’s so in love with his best friend, and that’s all that matters.

There’s nothing but silence after his (lengthy) confession. Jackson doesn’t know what to make of it, just lets himself breathe, enjoy the weight off his chest and the weight of Jinyoung’s hand, still in his.

Jinyoung makes a sound, like he has something to say, but doesn’t know how, so he stops. Silence resumes, but Jackson’s okay with that.

“I love you.” Jackson’s head snaps up at that. “I love you.” Jinyoung says firmer, without a doubt. He breathes. “I love you, I- I really do.” There’s no but. It’s just a fact, that’s it, that’s all to it. That’s all that’s ever been to it. “I love you.” Jinyoung doesn’t know what else to say. Because that’s all to it, isn’t it? It’s as simple as that. He’s always loved Jackson, in every single way, not in at least just one way like Jackson was thinking. The idiot.

Jinyoung doesn’t have a sudden, overwhelming revelation. It’s just there. Like how his love for Jackson has always been a constant. It’s there, it’s prominent, and very true. He loves him, there’s nothing else to it. Nothing complicated about it.

“I love you. And you love me.” Jinyoung moves closer to Jackson, the bedsheet crinkles between them. “Sorry it took a while.” Jinyoung smiles, lets go of Jackson’s hand and cups his face, traces his cheeks with his thumbs. Hesitantly, cautiously, he leans closer to him and presses his lips softly on Jackson’s and then pulls away. It’s a dry kiss, a mere soft peck. But Jinyoung musters up the rest of his courage, Jackson’s been brave enough, it’s his turn.

He leans back in, one hand sliding to rest comfortably behind Jackson’s neck. He presses deeper this time, more confidently. He swipes his tongue across his bottom lip, nips at it before Jackson’s brain catches up to him and he’s kissing back.

There’s an incessant press of the lips. The quick swipe of the tongue, tasting, taking in each other. Their laboured breaths are suddenly the only thing they can hear other from the pounding of their hearts, their breathing loud and heavy. Like their kisses.

They kiss languidly, no rush, no expectation of sex, they kiss just because they _can_ now. They kiss for all those kisses they missed out on, they kiss for the comfort they find in each other, they kiss in relief knowing that they love and they have each other, they kiss to say I love you.

Jackson presses a kiss on the corner of Jinyoung’s lips. _I love you._ Jinyoung retaliates by tilting his head so they can kiss deeper, a firm push on Jackson’s back to bring them closer. _I love you too._

“I can’t believe you didn’t notice how I loved you.” Jackson says, when they finally pull away, feigning annoyance. “For an honours student, you’re pretty dumb.” Jinyoung snorts at that.

“I did notice. I always knew you loved me.” _That’s a constant, your love,_ Jinyoung thinks to himself. “I guess, I just didn’t realize just how much. But, I’m glad we’re on the same page now.” Jinyoung turns his head away, cheeks burning.

Jackson laughs, loud and easy, sending a pang to Jinyoung’s heart. Leaving it all fluttery and happy.

Jinyoung thinks about all those time he felt his heart lurch at the thought of Jackson, how his heart swooned at the happiness in his laughter, how it flipped when he watched Jackson compete in those long fencing competitions, how it absolutely skipped a beat when they touched each other. Think about how he loved Jackson as a friend before, loves him right now in another way, loves him in every way. Thinks about how normal this all is, this newfound but old love, how this felt the same but different in a familiar way. He looks at Jackson, the soft glow of the sun coming in through his window, illuminating Jackson’s face in the most aweing way. He looks. He thinks.

_Yeah, this is love too._

**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos are very much appreciated!! also like,, yall should comment prompts bc im in a slump but I rly wanna write heh.  
> thank you for getting to the end of this!!
> 
> follow me on twt: @jinhaebaby


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